Ashgabat is a sprawling city that requires you to drive in order to get anywhere. And each time you get behind the wheel, a rather strange and frightening adventure awaits. As a passenger, I get to sit back and watch this, which provides no end of entertainment.
The streets of the city are crammed with small, Turkmen made cars, Toyotas, and SUVs. Licenses are easy to get here-- I'm told that you just pay the correct fee. Cars can be bought at the used car market at Talkulchka, the largest open air market in Central Asia that is located right outside of Ashgabat.
The roads are fairly rough, with plenty of bumps along the way, but that is not the most entertaining part of the trip. A two lane road typically means you will have four lanes of traffic, with cars freely drifting every which-way in their attempt to get beyond the car in front of them. The painted lines on the road, including lane guides and pedestrian cross-walks, are beautiful decorations with little real meaning. Turning lanes are whoever can get across enough lanes of traffic in order to turn in that direction (no specific lane needed). You swerve around the driver drifting towards you on one side, honk your horn at the person going much slower than anyone on the highway, and then dodge two or three pedestrians on your way to beating the light before it starts to flash.
As though the driving isn't special enough, Turkmenistan has unique traffic lights. While in the U.S. there is the red, yellow, green system, they do have all these colors represented in their lights. Green means go, flashing green is the equivalent of yellow in the States, either slow down or get through the light, yellow means the other way is about to start going and you'd better be stopped, and red means don't even think about moving. When a yellow light appears below the red light after you've stopped, it's time to start moving and you will be honked at if you don't hit the gas.
Pedestrians bring a whole new level of attention to driving through the city. The ubiquitous, orange garbed street cleaning ladies fill the side of the street and often wander into it during their cleaning duties. They don't even flinch as cars pass within inches of hitting them. Then there are the folks who run across the road and pray that they aren't hit.
The last couple of unique things about the roads in Ashgabat are the potholes and the effect sprinklers have on other drivers. You almost need an SUV to be able to not be jostled too much, and sprinklers cause other drivers to do their dangnest to avoid any wet spots on the road, causing them to completely avoid areas where the water from the sprinklers accidentally overflows onto the road. Granted, it's a desert and water is not common to drive in, but it's particularly entertaining to watch this phenomenon.
The last couple of unique things about the roads in Ashgabat are the potholes and the effect sprinklers have on other drivers. You almost need an SUV to be able to not be jostled too much, and sprinklers cause other drivers to do their dangnest to avoid any wet spots on the road, causing them to completely avoid areas where the water from the sprinklers accidentally overflows onto the road. Granted, it's a desert and water is not common to drive in, but it's particularly entertaining to watch this phenomenon.
Police jump out from bushes waving striped sticks, some with lights on top of them, when they feel a traffic law has been violated (though I have not figured out what traffic laws actually exist). They're somewhat effective, causing some people to actually pull over, but as they are unarmed and as I have not seen them chase down a car in an actual vehicle, I'm not sure how many times they collect on traffic violators.
The best advice I received upon arriving was not to drive unless it is an emergency. I am extremely happy to remain a passenger in this city.
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